Tanya, Please Move Your Cupboard and Other Urgent Matters

GILL MENGUY- please return my stapler as a matter of urgency.

Does anyone know where the spare chair leg is?

Does anybody want a wee magnum before i give it to the man outside? xx

Beech need lettuce

Sharlene feed fish

Does anyone fancy a trip to Greggs?

MIA LET ME IN PLEASE MY TIGHTS ARE SOAKED LET ME IN PLEASE

i’ll be up in a minute i just need my maltesers

Tanya’s on the floor again

Why is my son locked in the walk in freezer?

Can anyone come downstairs i require assistance NOW

Why is the downstairs printer smoking??

DO NOT approach Tanya unless you have some form of peace offering.

Leah get fob please i need pool noodle out gym cupboard

Why is there a paper plate with my face on it in the training room.

Can anyone bring H18 keys over please? Linda has locked herself in and is threatening to exit via the window xx

Does anyone know the location of Gill Menguys crocs?

I am going to the roof don’t follow me

TANYA CAN YOU MOVE YOUR FUCKING CUPBOARD FROM OUTSIDE MY OFFICE DOOR YA CLUELESS CUNT

Mia bring me slice of bread and hot chocolate please

Does anyone have a spare fish tank

Does anyone want to run away with me and Katie to start a new life in Vegas?

I think i’d make a good resident

Ana wants to know if anybody wants to go to Arnold Clark tonight with her.

Lana is in full scottish attire and will not stop offering me iron bru

If anyone gets any water coming through the ceiling don’t worry the dishwasher on elm has just exploded xx

Tanya come upstairs but leave your shoes and socks downstairs

TANYA DO YOU NOT HAVE ANY OTHER WEE PLACE TO DEPOSIT YOUR ABNORMALLY LARGE CABINET EXCEPT RIGHT OUTSIDE MA WEE OFFICE YA MELT GET IT SHIFTED

does anybody have big fridge key?

Ana has accidentally dropped the radio in the fish tank

Karen and Sharlene why is the minibus outside my house

Lana has just shredded her bank card

Why have i just found my car keys in the bath?

Brooke can you print me off the lyrics to vengabus xx

Who has hid my glasses you lab made imbeciles

I’m busy Celia’s on the floor again